Monday, March 31, 2008

A Funny Japanese Commercial


First off, I want to thank everyone for their comments about the film. It was a fun project to work on (except the rendering section which was a bitch). Aside from technical missteps, I'm generally satisfied with the final product. A couple facts for the road though.

1) There is no EPISODE 2 coming. This was a creative impulse and I don't believe in sequels. Spin-Offs and Alternative Universes are possible though. I already thought of a John Tat Peep Spin-Off feature a Farm full of Different Colored Peeps.
2) Three characters had chopped off body parts that were either replaced with an object or just left alone. Try to guess!
3) I still don't understand Adobe Premiere, but I have sort of figured out the basics for now.
4) This actually was fun to work on because I got to incorporate my love for video games and other geek-related media into a project that will probably be timeless. Remember all those damn "OMG. They killed Kenny" jokes? Not here, thankfully. Oh, I love finding and mixing music with different scenes!
5) Wang Films is not BACK necessarily. I like to work mysteriously. Like the Wind on a Cool Autumn Day....or a Cool Winter Day...or any of those damn seasons.

And what you were actually waiting for, a hilarious Japanese Commercial:

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Directorial Debut of "Episode 1: Up to Nooo Good!"



I recommend clicking the embedded clip and watching it on its you tube page. I highly recommend this because my blogger is cutting of the sides of the film (it is a wide screen presentation).

This is the soon to be famous (at least amongst my social circle) as the Dave Louie Birthday Video. It is pretty decent if you get the video game references or know the people in the film. In terms of effort, it took two or three nights of Premiere to get shots and make up a plot as I go along.

For those willing to venture, I placed some interesting Easter eggs within this film for geeks and fans of Dave (and co). See if you can find them all! One film mistake involves Silent Hill being credited. In actuality, that clip was removed and replaced with a Ratatouille clip. Wow. That's absurd when you think about it...

Enjoy!

Friday, March 28, 2008

A preview of things to come

It is coming....

Cracked Spider-Man Web Comics

I found these a long time ago on the internet. Granted, not everyone shares my love for blatantly offensive comics, but I decided to showcase three of my favorite CRACKED spider-man comics before give you a link to the whole archive (it is actually more of a book shelf then an archive and I stress "shelf")


So TRUE.


This kept me laughing for minutes.


And this is just CLASSIC. The link for the rest are here.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Crazy Japanese Hairdryers


For the suicidal types, I offer you the opportunity to toy around with the concept with the WESTERN Dryer. This is not a mock up.


First off, Japan, there is no record of women in the Old West ever using a gun to blow dry their hair. Perhaps, the women in the frontier days may have wanted to commit suicide due to inadequate rights and just down-right despicable machismo in the West. This COULD be true. However, this does not make this MODERN day device less weird.

For the settings, you actually cock the gun back before you start drying your hair. For the record, I am surprised at how functional these hair dryers. Back in the day, I was only familiar with High, Low, and maybe a Medium if we were lucky. Oh shit, that's what the numbers mean here too. Oh well.

Japan, you so crazy awesome. Let me be more gramatically incorrect with you just because I love your craziness.

For more information, go to this purchases website.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Pika-gina? Oh, Happy Birthday to Davey Boy.


I found this on Japanator who I am pretty damn sure took it from someone else. Anyway, images such as this remind me of childhood innocence. Prior to proper sexual education in the 4th grade, we would all dive into the "vaginas" of our favorite childhood characters without any hesitation. Now we are all so damn concerned with STDs and moral laws of conduct that we forget about FREEDOM. The freedom to dive into any "pika-gina" we want.

On a side note, Pikachu looks GODDAMN pleased with himself. There is no confusing the excitement on Pikachu's face. Although you can't see his tail, I think you imagine its position.

Alright, spoiler alert. It's pointing up. REALLY HIGH UP.

Oh, Happy Birthday Dave! This is the gift of life.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

The Uncanny Valley gets Creepier


Seriously, this little cg creation by some Japanese computer engineers really looks like a Japanese woman. For the records, she is ALL CG. However, there were times when her eye movement looks distinctively human. What tips the human eye off thought is her unnatural smile at times. Also, as a Japanese person, she would never look you directly in the face and apologize constantly (kidding kidding!). Click here or click the picture to see the face in ACTION.

"You may think it's not your problem" Part II

A while back, I introduced some public service announcements from Green Lantern (Both White and Black varieties!). Well, here is another one with the Teen Titans. Things to consider:

1) Nightwing has a RIDICULOUS outfit. Get over it .
2) The girl in white is Donna Troy, Wonder Woman's sister who isn't really his sister and has a huge backstory that I will never ever try to explain in this blog.
3) Beast Boy is sort of an asshole.


What do you think? Protect yourself. Know the Facts.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Japanese Ambassador - Doraemon!


Recently, Doraemon (a popular Japanese anime character) recieved his official assignment letter from Foreign Minister Masahiko Komura. The character will appear in films to be shown in Japanese missions overseas, talking about the country's lifestyle and customs.

"By appointing Doraemon, we hope people in other countries will understand Japanese anime better and deepen their interest in Japanese culture," said Yuko Hotta, a foreign ministry official.

Wow. Cool. I would have voted for Astro Boy though. Guess, we know Japan's stance on used half-naked Japanese robot boys as Government symbols.

Superman is the BLACKEST criminal EVER!

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Kenneth Eng- Super Exciting Asian Supremacist Hero!!

Many people will tell you that Asian people are racist and I am not inclined to disagree. Assholes come in many shades regardless of what color you are as my grand "pappy" used to say. Back in the day when I shot sawed off shotguns, I was taught a little something called TOLERANCE.


Meet Kenneth Eng. He used to be this freelance writer (who actually got published in REAL newspapers!), but is also pretty damn racist.


OUCH. Oh. He also hates Asians too! On Jan 12, 2007, Kenneth Eng hates how
"Asians in America is how so many of them want to suck up to whites," "how little pride they have," and the "how apathetic many of them are toward honor." Wow, this guy is sort of a jerk-off. Oh, this story gets better. The following is from the San Francisco Gate:

‘Hate’ columnist Eng arrested in N.Y. for alleged harassment

(05-23) 12:44 PDT NEW YORK CITY — Kenneth Eng, the author of a controversial AsianWeek column that described reasons to “hate” black people, is being held in a New York jail without bail on assault and harassment charges.

Eng, 23, was arrested on suspicion of threatening to kill his Queens neighbors and one of their pets. He was arraigned May 11 on charges of attempted assault, menacing, possession of a weapon and harassment.

Eng allegedly approached the mother and daughter as they stood in their driveway with their pet and said, “If your dog bites me, I will kill you and your family.” He then called the mother fat and lazy and swung a hammer at her and the dog, according to the Queens district attorney’s office.

Eng used to be a regular contributor to San Francisco-based AsianWeek, writing from New York. He was fired in February after public outcry over his racist and discriminating columns. In his writings, Eng called himself an “Asian supremacist” and listed reasons to hate black people as well as Asians and whites.

Eng’s attorney has asked that he undergo a mental examination. He is scheduled to return to court in Queens on June 13.

Booyah. Luckily, I don't know shit about hammers unless Thor throws them.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

A Filipino Animated Film?



Princess Urduja is actually a HUGE member of Asian mythology apparently. I stumbled upon this video project a couple days ago and decided to do some research on it.

Urduja was a legendary warrior-princess who is recognized as a heroine in Pangasinan. After attempting to locate and define what a Pangasinan was, I went on to watch this trailer. I suggest looking her up on Wikipedia if this entry actually interests you. FASCINATING STUFF. This film almost seems like the Filipino's answer to Disney's Pocahontas. Except this woman may actually kick some more ass as opposed to making out with a cartoon character that sounds like Mel Gibson. This video is in Tagalog by the way. I think it is at least...

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Are we obsessed with "Friendship Tests"?



Does this picture have much to do with the topic? Not particularly. However, a friend of mine recently brought to attention the fact that I (and other males in my particular social group) are enamored of the old age game called the "Friendship Test." From what it sounds like, it goes a little like the following:

Male A will devise a plan that will cause Males B and C to take notice of something different. This may range from a new haircut to a new t-shirt to even Male A's blatant absence. Now, according to this theory (or fact), we will use these events to see if Males B and C would give a rat's ass and mention the change. If the change is noticed, that bond is strengthened or simply "confirmed." If not noticed, it will spark a wily discussion amongst Male A and other individuals outside the circle until someone from this "outside circle" leaks out information surreptitiously or accidentally to B and (or) C. In other words, we are sensitive creatures that create this drama despite complaining about the drama that other people perpetuate in their lives. All in all, this is actually a harmless cycle that does little harm to the actual friendships. This is akin to the superfluous nature of girls wanting guys to notice their own changes and forcing the guy in question to play a guessing game that ultimately leads nowhere (generally, guys either lose or win with dumb luck). Male friendship, although tough on the outside, is ultimately more sensitive and ninja-like than one is willing to admit. Though it will never be as conniving and sneaky as the female friendships (which always begs the question if girls are friends with each other on the surface or under that layer of bitchiness). For the record, I am not criticizing women, just girls.

Oddly enough, I find myself not disproving this post. This passage accompanied by wordy liberal arts language just reveals a facet of humanity that lies in the seedy underbelly of civilization. Plus, I wanted to have an excuse to put up that picture of Batman/Superman.

Japan loves the Chocolate Penis



I got an e-mail from Steph with some pictures. Needless to say, I found the above picture to be the best. She begins to discuss this picture by mentioning that "...my favorite concession stand food was the artfully shaped chocolate-covered banana. They cut off one tip, then attached it to the other tip with a toothpick before dipping it. Unfortunately they ran out of the penis-shaped lollipops."

According to Stephanie, there is a festival on March 15th that glorifies fertility. Every year, they choose a well-known carver to take a whole tree and transform it into a giant majestic oak of a penis. Needless to say, I am in awe.

Stephanie describes it best by noting that "this was the best Japanese festival I've ever been to." I am inclined to agree. Japan. Wait for me! Don't stop being crazy!

Speaking of which, Steph also mentioned that the Vagina festival was before that. After noting that the festival was actually less exciting, I sort of came to a realization that the penis is just much more expressive than a Vagina. Vaginas are sort of there and stare at you. Like Princess Peach in Bowser's Castle, she sits there saying "woe is me" and doesn't get out much. Perhaps, it could be more expressive with the PR firms. However, penises have been glorified enough in the media that they can practically look at the camera and flash a Tom Cruise-level (minus the weirdness of Scientology). Vaginas just don't look that great on paper or as something to iconify (I made up a word, what are you going to do about it? Nothing. That's what I'm talking about). Now, Penises are the Hollywood Equivalent of Will Smith at the Box Office when it comes to the audience recognizing and smiling about some sexual organ.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Watchmen and the Peanuts



This is just too cool for school.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

The Infamous Prophetic Japanese Wartime Cartoon



I saw snippets of this film during my Sophomore year at Tufts in my Japanese Popular Culture Class. This is an interesting piece of wartime propaganda because it features Mickey Mouse clones invading a peaceful island of Japanese inhabitants. In order to protect the people, the country summons its greatest warriors from folklore to combat these Disney abominations (some are also Felix the Cat and Fleischer-style works). What is fascinating about this work appears to either represent the events of Pearl Harbor or the Japanese defending against the United States. EXCEPT this film called "Toy Box Series, Episode 3: Picture Book 1936” was made in 1934 AND this was made seven years before Pearl Harbor.



For the record, those dancing animals at the end gave me the creeps.

Via Pink Tentacle

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Smash Brothers is AMAZING


BRILLANCE.

I love this game. I do not even have to describe why. Let these pictures tell the story. This game features a camera that allows you to take pictures of gameplay and trophies. Needless to say, I stole these pictures from the Smash Brothers Website.



Thursday, March 6, 2008

I see Watchmen!

Well, Zack Snyder updated his Watchmen Blog. I'm still concerned about this film ( the story primarily), but I do think that Zac Snyder almost nailed all these characters design-wise at least.

Nice Outfit. Reminiscent of Batman Begins. He's not fat enough though. I don't sense "out of work superhero" here.

PERFECT. This shot really shows that they captured the character. This shot just emanates "ASSHOLE."

Not happy with this one. Though Ozymandias was always a delicate and elegant character, the actor just look so SMALL in that outfit.

Perhaps, the best update of the 80s superheroine. She looks less ridiculous than the comic books. She looks less like a stripper and more like a hero here. Though still wearing the spandex, but that's superheroin' for you.

Perfect. This was nailed. Nailed goddamn well.

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Stephen Chow's New Film "CJ7"

Stephen Chow's latest film came out recently. It is no secret with my friends that I love Stephen Chow. He is a budding director that is fearless when it comes to experimenting on the silver screen with comedy and special effects. How can you hate this guy? It would take some sort of Anti-Chowite, I guess.

It is a story about an alien coming from out of space. Honestly, the premise itself indicates that this won't play as well in the West as Kung Fu Hustle or Shaolin Soccer. However, I am really pleased to see Stephen Chow return to his roots in comedy. Prior to those two films, his comedies were "cartoonish" without relying on martial arts choreography. Here's hoping that CJ7 is fun. It looks like Flubber, Air Bud, and Chicken Little in one film. Those were all average films at best, but Stephen Chow is one of the funniest people ever. It should be better than Evan Almighty at least.



A scene from the Flirting Scholar that show off what this CJ7 could be in tone and humor (without tons of crazy choreography).

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Obama-Town

Instead of studying, I decided to peruse some blogs. Low and behold, I came across some old articles about Barack Obama. I know, it sounds boring. How about the town of Obama? Alright, you are probably thinking that there is practically a city named after everyone in the States. How about if this city was Japan? So? More interesting. Well, this city also loves Obama like he is practically a representative of the small fishing town.


"As the race for the nomination heated up, the town's tourism office received a stream of calls from locals wishing Obama well. On Super Tuesday, supporters nervously clutched photos of Obama as they watched the results come in at their makeshift headquarters in a hotel, whose lobby is currently home to a large portrait of the candidate."

"Obama's most ardent fans, who include a hotel executive and a couple of farmers, believe their campaign, like that of their hero, is gathering momentum. With his name recognition at an all-time high, they plan to produce hachimaki "victory" headbands - a common campaign accoutrement in Japan - themed lacquerware chopsticks, and manju sweet buns bearing his name and face."


The mayor, Murakami, also noted that Barack Obama's birthday, August 4, happens to be "Chopsticks Day" in the city.

Article and Quotes from the Guardian
Pictures from Google News

Monday, March 3, 2008

"You may think it's not your problem..." - Comic Books on AIDs and Homosexuality

I don't know about you, but my favorite superheroes don't just serve the community with fists and super powers. NOPE. It is also a well-known fact that many superheroes can also protect and serve the country through the power of WORDS. In fact, I would be an extreme Asian supremacist without the work of our greatest superheroes. Over this week, I will post some friendly public announcements by my favorite superheroes.

Ah, Jon Stewart, the BLACK Green Lantern, is spreading the word regarding homosexuality and AIDs. Notice the lack of super powers (except for the flight and glowing ring). But wait....


....here's the exact same ad, but with Hal Jordan. * gasp * He's a WHITE Green Lantern and basically saying the EXACT same thing. Hell, all the background characters are the same. It is fascinating to see DC and the public service organizations use these two characters interchangeably to tell the same messages. Intriguing, indeed. Notice, that Jon Stewart (the Black one) has a darker background for the bottom panel.

Scans are courtesy of residents on Scans Daily as usual...

The Whiz Kids


Are these "Whiz Kids" the Army's Secret Army? Maybe that is North Korea's grand plan. Get all the smartest Korean Starcraft players to plan "rushes" and "micromanagement" of the forces. I also can't stand how I feel like I could swap any Asian on the street with the kids in this photo. This TIME picture screams "GENERIC ASIAN" on its forehead and I feel compelled to just fold the corners of the book just to make this cover less stereotypical. I'm pretty suren that kid in the red-white-blue shirt (patriotism on a t-shirt) was on the Chess Team. His name was Chang Chen or Chen Chang. Or John Chang. Or was it Ken? Ken. Definitely Ken. Glad to see you alive, Ken.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Stuff that Asian People Like

Inspired by the "Stuff that White People Like" Blog, I thought about the Asian populace. What do we like? Can I do it without being racist or offensive? Well, here is an attempt at one thing that we DO like. Keeping in mind how awesome that blog is, this is an EXTREMELY modest attempt.


Eating Stuff that White People Avoid like the Plague

As an Asian-American, I always find myself with people that cannot stand the cartilage in their Beef Noodle Soups, the oddly bland texture of tripe, and the difficulty of eating chicken feet. Hell, most Americans can't stand eating Kimchi (seasoned fermented cabbage). Well, Asian Americans will lovingly embrace these products with unparalleled zeal. For whatever reason, we will gulp it down with a satisfaction that practically damns the "white" foreigners for their inability to have the courage or the desire to engage in our ancient practices. Why? Is it the taste? Take it from this Asian American, YES and NO. We do enjoy the flavors of these odd-ball products, but we truly enjoy rubbing it all your faces (you...being the white man). In our own odd way, it is practically our own way of competing with white people. I can't tell you how many times we all enjoy waving Kimchi around like Lex Luthor taunting Superman with Kryptonite.


Take that, white man! Take that! Due to our superior Asian ego, we will laugh and taunt you. Sure, there are some Asians that won't vocally make fun of you, but they are using their "inside voice." This inside voice is like an Amy Tan novel that shakes its head and says, "what a silly white person." These are the little kicks in our otherwise, "Asian" lives.

Be Kind Rewind Impressions (Plus Surprises from the Pacific)



First, this was a gift that Stephanie made for her students that graduated several hours ago in Japan. I wanted to post this up because I thought it looked really impressive. It took three hours to make paper roses of different colors. Try to count how many there are....seriously, shoot for it.

"Be Kind Rewind" is not a great film. Hell, it is not even a good film. In fact, the film is really a case of self-indulgence for Michel Gondry. This is the FIRST time that I can safely say that I felt the director's passion or love for the project despite disliking the film. There are a multitude of problems with "Be Kind Rewind," but I am only going to focus on the elements that really bothered me. The script was also written by Michel Gondry and feels as patched together as the "sweded" works that it features. "I do not know if this was intentional, but it hurts the film either way. You can tell that he just threw scenes into the film on a whim and could have cared less about editing it all together into a cohesive project. This is evident in the characters themselves. Jack Black's character is a jerk while Mos Def just has mentor issues with Danny Glover. The characters are NOT compelling ENOUGH. I want to stress "ENOUGH" because there was a HUGE opportunity here. However, the scenes that would represent character development are patched into the plot. There is also a level of CHEESE in this film that may sit uncomfortably with the audience. I tried to keep my mind open, but I could only sit there fathoming why this movie had almost the same ending as "Angels in the Outfield." At least, that ending fit. I do not want to spoil this film, but I think you have the idea.

However, this film also dredged up emotions that I have long since forgotten. For the uninitiated, I used to make films in high school. For some reason, I became an icon of some sort for being a lone Asian American who carried video camera around the school. In fact, almost all my pictures were sweded! My first film was an English project about Frankenstein. With only a camera and a tape recording as my starting materials, I made a film that stole the hearts of everyone at the school. Like Gondry's film, I filmed everything chronologically (no editing) and relied on anything I could find to make the moments cinematic. I made gravestones out of cereal boxes, played cassette recordings during rolling scenes, and even devised contraptions for complicated scenes (such as Frankenstein's birth which was just a Pink Panther doll, hangers, and cloth). Gondry's film made me remember how great it felt to create a cinematic experience with no budget and just love. However, there is more to this story. After I made my film, my high school peers started making their own "sweded" films. I was later credited for starting a Film Club movement in the school. Why? Why do people love these crappy high school films?

Michel Gondry answers this question in the film. For my high school peers, making a film always seemed like a distant world from their own. When they watch films in a theater, they view Hollywood and CINEMA as a separate entity that they could never make on their own. Sure, they could make home movies, but these are not films. After all, can we create inventive car chases, martial arts scenes, or emotionally driven epiphanies in the rain? Prior to my work on these projects, they never even considered that they could accomplish this on a regular video camera. Once I pulled it off, everyone either wanted to be in my film or be a part of a production process. Basically, a new avenue of creativity opened up. There was a creative explosion at the school. Every time someone made a film, they would set up showings in the library so people could watch it during study hall. Gondry's film echoes this great feeling of making a film with your peer and for your peers. Although I made films in college later, I always felt that my first high school films represented a love of film that did not rely on fancy editing or sweeping special effects. Creating a "sweded" film is more complicated, but it was the most fun I ever had making films in retrospect. Sorry for the long post, but I assure you that this is as close as I will get to "personal blog posting." Now for your entertainment....



This is a fan trailer that an Anime fan made that honors Ghibli films (Totoro, Nausicca, Mononoke, etc.) It is also in the style of the Chronicles of Narnia trailer. Practically, frame by frame....it's pretty cool.

Saturday, March 1, 2008

Conan O' Brien: Secrets

With the writer strike back, I'm a little bit sad that Conan will be going back to scripted monologues. Out of all the talk show hosts (including Stewart and Colbert), Conan shined the most. He was on his feet, saying everything that entered his mind, and liberated somewhat. However, I am looking forward to one segment that he does from time to time. "Secrets" is a gag that lets celebrities tell their darkest thoughts to the late night world. I can only find three on youtube, but they are all funny.



David Bowie is HYSTERICAL. The best of three.



Tom Hanks is fun too.



Shatner is batshit crazy, but you already knew that.



Ha! This is the new Iron Man trailer which looks FANTASTIC. It looks and sounds exactly what an Iron Man SHOULD BE. Everything looks just about perfect except for a proper villain. Although I was hoping for the Mandarin, I'm comforted by the fact that all the armor just looks goddamn great. For everyone not familiar with Iron Man, Robert Downey Jr. currently nails Tony Stark. Imagine Bruce Wayne except he really was a smarmy, rich asshole. Enjoy!